Here's an edited version of a 15-minute Christmas discussion with Fred, Mary, Lindsay and Anne Steiner about Christmases past.
F: What's the first present you can remember?
L: I remember that orange sled and a bear backpack. I was five maybe, four.
A: Way younger than that. Three, because I was not around.
A: Those little train sets and the Barbie houses that Pop made us.
F: They are down in the basement. Anytime you want them you may have them.
A: Why doesn't Lindsay tell us about Christmas tree ornaments... your favorite one's.
L: Ruth and Boaz with a piece of wheat stuck to it. Made it Weekday Christian Ed.
F: Were there any Christmas presents that you saw before they were wrapped?
A: Definitely. First of all one year I found Baby Roller Blade and Crash Test Dummy under your bed.
L: I thought it was California Roller Baby.
A: No, that was a different doll.
M: I unwrapped a doll when I was around 7. I asked for a doll. I got up real early. There was a box behind the tree. I wanted to make certain it was the doll. I opened it to make certain that it was the right doll and it was. I wrapped it back and pretended to be surprised.
L: Get this, crash test dummies are real cadavers. "Stiff," the book I'm reading explains that.
A: My crash test dummy was plastic.
F: How about Talk Boy?
A: That was pretty awesome.
L: It wins.
A: It just recovered what you said, but it could repeat it really slowly or really fast.
L: It was like the height of technology of the second "Home Alone" movie.
F: What did you wish you'd have received, but never got?
A: I always thought it would be fun to get a puppy for Christmas in a box with a red bow and super cute. But I like the dogs that I have now instead.
F: I thought I was going to get a hockey game and it turned out to be a three-way lamp.
F: Tell me about Christmas music.
L: Worst Christmas song ever was by Paul McCarthy with the synthesizer "Simply having a Wonderful Christmas Time."
A: I remember getting Hanson's Christmas CD and Boyzs to a Men Christmas CD.
F: I have those down in the basement awaiting you also.
F: My first-ever Christmas present record was either Spike Jones, "All I Want for Christmas is my Two front teeth," or The Singing Dog. Both 45 rpms. I think Rudi got the Spike Jones.
A: You can put "Cool Runnings" on the list. It was fake reggae music and I didn't understand.
F: I can't stand that Target ad with...
L: The band is Crystal Antlers. "10,000 watts."
F: it's sick.
M: My favorite Christmas song is the one the girls used to sing. "Jingle bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg. Bat mobile lost a wheel and Joker ran away. Hey."
A: How about, "Rudolph the reindeer had a very shiny nose... like a light bulb." Mrs. Caskey taught us.
F: You know what that jerk Garrison Keillor did? He reviewed Mark Twain's autobiography in the New York Times and he really didn't like it. I received the book today and am finding it fascinating.
A: I had to light an Advent candle one Sunday in church. My mentor and I were the first persons that year. To my surprise, the candle did not light and we tried it many times and stayed up there a long time. We dug out the wick and it finally lit. The next week Simon Chan went to light it and it took a long time, too.
M: Beth Boehr said that got a bad batch of candles that year.
L: The school band Christmas concerts were fun.
A: At the end the concert we sang "Twas The Night Before Christmas," and the little kids could go up on the stage with their PJs. I picked Kyla Dawson to sing with me. Might have been Katie Chappell who picked me. I can't remember.
M: I also sang it. I think I took Josh and Joel Yoder, Perry Yoder's twins.
F: All I can remember about that was that Deb McKibben whistled at the part where we sang "to his team gave a whistle." It was loud and the audience laughed.
M: My favorite present ever was a pair of red barrettes. Tom got them for me and he had pneumonia or scarlet fever. I was maybe 7ish. We got up early, but had to eat breakfast first. All of us had to sit down and eat together. It was torturous.
A: Were you ever disappointed for not receiving a gift you wanted?
M: I don't remember ever being disappointed except for the time I got the Chatty Cathy that quit talking the second day. We took it back and got a replacement. It also stopped talking the second day. Then I told my parents to take it back and get me ice skates.
A: I've never met Peter Frampton. But, Anna Enderle helped him shop for his wife's Christmas present.
At this point the conversation shattered into several pieces like a shattered Christmas tree ornament and it was impossible to keep up with the dictation.
