A university student's perspective on torn ACL: Persevering through pain

By Caitlin Nearhood, university intern

German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche was right when he said: “that which does not kill us makes us stronger.”

However, when I tore a crucial ligament in my right knee playing tennis last July, that phrase was the last thing on my mind.

For about a month, my family and I were clueless about my exact injury, as we had to go through two doctors just to have an MRI on my knee at a stubborn insurance company’s request. With move in day two days away, the news of a torn ACL and medial meniscus put a damper on my fall semester at school.

Luckily, the university generously provided me with a scooter, which I used all of fall semester. I eventually gave it back and had to rent a scooter from a local business for a month this semester since the university donated their scooters over Christmas break.

In addition to the scooter, I also used crutches during that time (which I had known how to use for over month) and relied on good friends and strangers to carry plate in the dining hall, open the door for me, and help me in some way. Eventually, the painful bone bruising in my leg went away completely after our October fall break and I started walking again, but still used a scooter at my surgeon’s request.

In total, I scooted around campus for about five months, and have used crutches for about four months.

It’s been tough.

Learning to be dependent after being conditioned to be an independent college student was one of my biggest challenges—letting go and letting others help me, even with little things that seemed silly for others to do for me, like carry my plate.

Loneliness was another obstacle during this trial. Since I couldn’t visit my friends in the neighboring dorm all the time, I stayed in my room often, working on homework. However, friends visited me and kept me company, whether they were passing by or just thinking about me.

During the beginning of fall semester, I doubted that things would become better. I lost hope, and I felt like I’d be disabled for a long time.

It wasn’t until two months before surgery that I realized that everything I went through so far-the frustrations from lack of mobility, insurance company demands, the overall change from my normal lifestyle-happened to make me a stronger person in the end. God began to reveal things that would change my perspective more and more as the trial progressed.

Slowly, I began to see Friedrich Nietzsche’s words in action.

During the two hardest weeks after surgery, I grew closer to God through reading my Bible, and realized that even during everything I went through, He was still there with me, even in my loneliness. He never abandoned me, though I abandoned Him and didn’t have enough faith in Him.

I discovered that this situation happened because it was an opportunity to grow closer to Him and show others God’s work in my life. He also showed me that I could have joy in trials. This new perspective made me persevere-even on days when I couldn’t handle the pain.

As I begin physical therapy in mid-February, I have hope and new insight-everyday is one day closer to a normal life, and that every day before today made me stronger.  I’m on the road to recovery now, so it can only go up from here.

Not only am I thankful for God’s love and guidance during this time, I’m also thankful for those that chose to help me in some way. From holding the door open to visiting me, I experienced God’s love through the actions of others from the tight campus community that is my second home. All of it was appreciated. I’m blessed.

From personal experience, adversity makes us stronger-it makes us work harder, and it challenges our character. At the end of the trial, we can come out as better people, if we want to be.

Caitlin Nearhood is a junior broadcasting and journalism major from Clyde, Ohio.

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