Constant practice makes a good loser

By Mary Pannabecker Steiner

I lose things. Constantly. Sometimes I find them, sometimes not. Sometimes I replace the lost item and find the old one months later. I find some comfort in realizing that this is not a new (i.e. older-age) problem. It's been ongoing since childhood.

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My mom is still laughing over the memory of me diving into the Buckeye Quarry with my glasses on. Someday a giant trout will appear at the annual derby wearing a pair of tortoise shell glasses.

Periodically, one of my daughters will call and tell me she's lost something. I suspect she is looking for sympathy but all I can do is laugh. It must be genetic. I wonder if my brothers lose things as often as I do? Of course, they'd never tell me so I might have to ask their wives. They'll tell me.

Here's the thing. When it's something of little value or can easily be replaced/remade (i.e., a grocery list), there's little angst involved. But since most of what I tend to lose is not so easily replaceable or something I need immediately (i.e., the car keys), well, you can imagine the scene.

This is when I start throwing things around, pulling things out of drawers, digging through pockets, searching under the seats of the cars, and generally causing havoc around the house. It isn't pretty.

So...just for the record, I thought I'd list the things I've lost over the past month. If I can just remember...those little gray cells often fail me these days.

1.) Cho-Pat Dual Action Knee Strap - last I saw it was on Feb.1 when I packed it in the duffle I was taking to Cincy. When we got ready to run, it was nowhere in sight. This is not a good thing when running on hills. Now, 10 days later, I still haven't found it. It wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't already lost two of them. So...now another is on order.

2.) Cell phone - Okay, truthfully, I lose this at least once a day. Usually, it just involves tracking down my husband's phone and calling myself. He loses his more often than I do, so he has a little more sympathy for me when this happens.

3.) The car. Yep. Again, this happens on a regular basis...usually in large parking lots that don't have helpful numbered aisle markers. This week, this involved my rental - a silver Chevy Cruze. There seems to be an inordinate number of silver automobiles of this size. Of course, it was dark and the lot wasn't well-lit so that didn't help matters. I had to quell my rising panic that someone had stolen it, while I walked up and down the rows until I finally saw the telltale license plate frame of Stratton Auto.

4.) Debit card. I know...everyone loses those. But this was really bugging me. I'd used it the night before, so it had to be somewhere...which is what I say about everything I lose. Debit/credit cards are scarier, though, because of the frighteningly obvious concerns of them falling into the wrong hands. Usually, when this happens, you have to call the bank quickly and let them deal with it. This time, though, I finally remembered that I'd stuck it in the inside pocket of my coat...so I wouldn't lose it. Of course.

5.) Two - not one, but two - diamond solitaires. Not the actual ring...just the stone. The first disappeared on a dark and stormy night on a gravel drive. The second disappeared about 25 years later on a bright, sunny day. Both involved calls to insurance companies. Learned my lesson. Gave up on diamonds and replaced it with a genuine peridot.

6.) Library book on CD. I have the final CD...just can't find the other six and their box. This could be costly. And much as I love Stuart Woods, I can only listen to Stone Barrington's fascinating conclusion so many times.

7.) A student's folder. This happens once in awhile, but it's not always my fault. Sometimes they get misfiled. But this usually happens when I have a meeting with said student in about 30 minutes. Which, by the way, has already happened today.

I wonder if it's bad luck to admit that I lose things? Probably not. It would probably happen just as often if I never told anyone. But I'd better quit while I'm ahead. Besides, I've got to head off to that meeting. Now....if I can just find that Prius smart key fob. Anyone seen this?

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